For my birthday I got a humidifier and a de-humidifier... I put them in the same room and let them fight it out.

The way I see it, you should live everyday like its your birthday.

I'm not materialistic. I believe in presents from the heart, like a drawing that a child does.

Your children need your presence more than your presents.

How old would you be if you didn't know how old you are?

When someone asks if you'd like cake or pie, why not say you want cake and pie?

I wanted to buy a candle holder, but the store didn't have one. So I got a cake.

A friend never defends a husband who gets his wife an electric skillet for her birthday.

God gave us the gift of life it is up to us to give ourselves the gift of living well.

I hate birthdays.