For my birthday I got a humidifier and a de-humidifier... I put them in the same room and let them fight it out.

The way I see it, you should live everyday like its your birthday.

If you can give your child only one gift, let it be enthusiasm.

A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age.

Success is like reaching an important birthday and finding you're exactly the same.

My father gave me the greatest gift anyone could give another person, he believed in me.

I do like to shock and surprise people. When it's all in good fun, of course.

How old would you be if you didn't know how old you are?

You know you're getting old when the candles cost more than the cake.

Your children need your presence more than your presents.