You know you're getting old when you get that one candle on the cake. It's like, 'See if you can blow this out.'

God gave us the gift of life it is up to us to give ourselves the gift of living well.

I hate birthdays.

A friend never defends a husband who gets his wife an electric skillet for her birthday.

I think, at a child's birth, if a mother could ask a fairy godmother to endow it with the most useful gift, that gift should be curiosity.

How old would you be if you didn't know how old you are?

For my birthday I got a humidifier and a de-humidifier... I put them in the same room and let them fight it out.

You know you're getting old when the candles cost more than the cake.

Let us celebrate the occasion with wine and sweet words.

The way I see it, you should live everyday like its your birthday.