I hate birthdays.

The way I see it, you should live everyday like its your birthday.

I remember when the candle shop burned down. Everyone stood around singing 'Happy Birthday.'

You know you're getting old when the candles cost more than the cake.

You know you're getting old when you get that one candle on the cake. It's like, 'See if you can blow this out.'

A friend never defends a husband who gets his wife an electric skillet for her birthday.

To me - old age is always ten years older than I am.

When someone asks if you'd like cake or pie, why not say you want cake and pie?

Let us celebrate the occasion with wine and sweet words.

God gave us the gift of life it is up to us to give ourselves the gift of living well.