Handmade presents are scary because they reveal that you have too much free time.

For my birthday I got a humidifier and a de-humidifier... I put them in the same room and let them fight it out.

How old would you be if you didn't know how old you are?

I do like to shock and surprise people. When it's all in good fun, of course.

Let us celebrate the occasion with wine and sweet words.

I hate birthdays.

A gift consists not in what is done or given, but in the intention of the giver or doer.

I'm not materialistic. I believe in presents from the heart, like a drawing that a child does.

All the world is birthday cake, so take a piece, but not too much.

The way I see it, you should live everyday like its your birthday.