God gave us the gift of life it is up to us to give ourselves the gift of living well.

Handmade presents are scary because they reveal that you have too much free time.

You know you're getting old when the candles cost more than the cake.

For my birthday I got a humidifier and a de-humidifier... I put them in the same room and let them fight it out.

The greatest gift that you can give to others is the gift of unconditional love and acceptance.

I wanted to buy a candle holder, but the store didn't have one. So I got a cake.

We'll take the cake with the red cherry on top.

A gift consists not in what is done or given, but in the intention of the giver or doer.

It is lovely, when I forget all birthdays, including my own, to find that somebody remembers me.

When someone asks if you'd like cake or pie, why not say you want cake and pie?