I think, at a child's birth, if a mother could ask a fairy godmother to endow it with the most useful gift, that gift should be curiosity.

To me - old age is always ten years older than I am.

We'll take the cake with the red cherry on top.

Success is like reaching an important birthday and finding you're exactly the same.

I hate birthdays.

I do like to shock and surprise people. When it's all in good fun, of course.

You know you're getting old when you get that one candle on the cake. It's like, 'See if you can blow this out.'

Handmade presents are scary because they reveal that you have too much free time.

The best way to remember your wife's birthday is to remember it once.

If you can give your child only one gift, let it be enthusiasm.