I remember when the candle shop burned down. Everyone stood around singing 'Happy Birthday.'

If you can give your child only one gift, let it be enthusiasm.

Our birthdays are feathers in the broad wing of time.

For my birthday I got a humidifier and a de-humidifier... I put them in the same room and let them fight it out.

Your children need your presence more than your presents.

I do like to shock and surprise people. When it's all in good fun, of course.

When someone asks if you'd like cake or pie, why not say you want cake and pie?

I'm not materialistic. I believe in presents from the heart, like a drawing that a child does.

I hate birthdays.

We'll take the cake with the red cherry on top.